i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
