you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
