She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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