I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
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