Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
i came on her dog
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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