I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
