On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize