My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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