I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize