there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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