No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
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