Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
