Ambien. No doubt about it.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
