i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
