Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
