is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
