She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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