oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
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