in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize