Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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