Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
