Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
