I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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