she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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