Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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