she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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