Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
