I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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