Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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