So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
