is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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