make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
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