White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize