Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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