quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
