That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
