youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize