can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
