Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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