Im at strip club and am horny
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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