I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
