Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
i out mim tonsoeep
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
