Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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