ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Panties = found
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
