So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize