Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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