dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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