He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
