Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
whose parrot is this?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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