Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+44): View more from England

Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.

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(813): View more from Florida

I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.

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(317): View more from Indiana

He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?

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(831): View more from California

Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.

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(251): View more from Alabama

PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?

(1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

You high??

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